Let's go! Listening to God requires action

Lately I've been craving a real stillness in my life. Maybe because as a full-time professional and mother of two very active elementary school children I don't have much of it. Plus, I KNOW God wants me to be still to be able to hear his voice. And I want to be obedient. 

A couple days ago I told my husband that what I want -- all I want -- is to go somewhere (a quiet lakeside, nature preserve or a tropical island -- please?) where I can truly unplug. I've got all these ideas for how to serve God and my family and replace my income. But I want God's blessing. For that, I told Dan, I need to get away -- far away. 

As we talked, I mentioned there was one thing I really want to do -- a fire in my belly -- but it seems the most unlikely of all. People would really (as if they aren't already) think I've lost my mind. He suggested that the fire in my belly might be God's doing. It was a revelation of sorts. 

We continued talking and I began to feel silly. I realized that if I can't learn to be still right where I am, I won't be able to hear his voice on my everyday walk. Yes, Jesus went off for 40 days for the biggest transition in his earthly life. It took him 40 days in the word, in prayer with God and no distractions to prepare for just a few years in ministry. The most three important years for the lives of all Christians. 

So, I guess it makes sense that for me to prepare for what's next, I need to be ready. Because really, do we give God this kind of time when we approach these big decisions in life? Do we allow him to fill us up with scripture and guidance? I admit, it probably won't require a tropical island, but I must learn to commit myself to him in meditation, prayer and solitude not just now but always. 

The truth, however, is that I don't even know what's next. I admit, I was kind of hoping that some time alone with him will include the neon flashing billboard-size sign with instructions on what to do with my grown-up mom-size life. 

It occurred to me that I'm putting a lot of burden on God. Not that he can't handle it, but he also expects me to meet him halfway. 

Jesus knew when he met with God in the desert what was coming next. But he didn't just commit himself during this period; it was the beginning of a deeper, richer relationship that guided him in all the challenges and trials that his ministry would include. They met daily and often for long periods. 

Psalm 143:8

Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I entrust my life. 

I read this verse. And read it again. And again. Read carefully, it's clear it requires ACTION. I can't stand idly by and expect God to do all the work. I must make a deliberate choice to put my trust in him. Not one time -- all the time. See how the scripture begins -- he requires my trust daily, just as I need signs of his enduring love every day. And they are there, when we are open to see them. 

What else does it say? More action. He is showing me the way -- but I need to GO. No more excuses. No more expectations that he do all the work. No more prayers for flashing, neon signs. I must take the path he sets out for me. 

I MUST GO.

And then meet him daily, for choosing to follow him is a commitment that must be renewed often.