Maximize momentum for lasting change

And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.

Philippians 1:6 (NLT)

     Today I can't stop thinking about this word and really more than that about the FEELING of momentum. Have you ever experienced it? 

     Maybe in an athletic or competitive event? 

     Or even in a day in which you started with a grateful heart and continued to express gratitude? 

     Or perhaps in a challenge you made for yourself...to pray or go to Bible study or stick to an exercise program? 

     The thing with momentum is that its beginnings have nothing to do with luck or chance, or possibly even desire. They have more to do with discipline. 

     The dictionary defines momentum as the force or speed of movement; impetus, as of a physical object or course of events. 

     But something can't begin moving on its own. 

     Have you ever wanted something really badly but did nothing to make it happen. Except maybe pray. 

     I prayed for a really long time for my body to heal. A lot of tears were shed in desperation. 

     But until I made a decision to ACT, nothing happened. Momentum requires ACTion. Action requires a decision. 

     My decision was that I would finally get "all in" about the clean eating and living I was professing. 

     As I did, I noticed some changes. At first they were small, and then when I reached out to start a nutrition program, the changes got dramatic and very quickly. I required two things for this to be successful: a decision to do it well (discipline) and faith it could help me. 

     With discipline and faith, I took action. With action came momentum. 

     Momentum is exciting, because that change I so desperately wanted was finally unfolding. I could feel it, and I could even see the inner healing on the outside of my body. 

     My faith grew even more. 

     But I never could have gotten there without action. Momentum requires force or speed to be initiated. 

     Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University taught me discipline with money. You may be wondering what this has to do with momentum, but you see, I needed to experience that change is good and that discipline leads to transformation. Once I had discipline with my finances, I decided to read my Bible daily. Once I was reading my Bible daily, I decided to pray daily. My continued commitment to action built my faith as I saw momentum in each area of my life. It played out in my physical life as well. We began meal planning, which requires discipline, and I started running races. In each area, I continued because I saw the positive impacts these actions were having in my life. Those positive impacts were the momentum. Once I got started, nothing could stop me because the reward was tangible at that point. 

     In 2 Timothy 4:7, Paul writes, "I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith." 

     It wasn't easy for Paul, as he was thrown in prison and persecuted for his discipline. But his momentum was salvation, not only for himself but for others. He had GOOD NEWS to share and nothing was going to stand in the way of his calling to spread the gospel. 

     Likewise, our momentum doesn't come without some jarring bumps. We get to decide if the pebble in our path will derail us completely, or if we pick it up, toss it out and continue forward. A little perseverance can help build and grow momentum.  With continued faith and decisions to act daily on what we believe is good for us, we can be sure that the fight we fight for will be "good," the races will be finished even if they aren't won and our faith will be preserved even when shaken. 

     Today, I am determined to capitalize on momentum. To lean into it and to not let life's little bumps along the way stop the good thing that God has started. How about you? 

My food addiction revelation

     So I'm standing in the mirror, just after a shower and getting frustrated at yet another hive-pimple breakout on my cheek. 
     And I have this ah-ha moment that's kind of depressing. I realize I have to admit something. Not just to myself, but to this blog and to anyone who will listen. Because God told me to share. (Read yesterday's entry.) 
     (Side note: It's really a big DANG IT moment, because I don't know about you, but I HATE admitting my weaknesses. Some people call that prideful. It's genetic in my neck of the woods.) 
     I am addicted to food. Sugary food. Chocolate food. Unhealthy food. All food. 
     I have a real problem. Really. I have a really real problem with food. 
     There. It's out. It hurts. 
     Right before my shower, I hate a fourth of a half-gallon of Praire Farms ice cream. It sat in my fridge for well over a week, and nobody ate it. So today in a moment of weakness that was just like all the others I had in the week that I was somehow able to overcome, I succumbed to it. I don't know why this time was different. I certainly was able to ignore that mouth-watering picture of a cow (Just kidding, cows don't make my mouth water. Well, maybe a little) a dozen other times I opened the freezer this week. But today, I ate it. I intended to eat just two bites. You know, because the "experts" say you really only need a couple bites to satisfy a craving. (What do they know?) 
     I bargained with myself. 
     I'll eat just a little more than that. 
     In my mind, I visually carved out a section that would be "acceptable" to eat. The smaller portion on the left side of the container, which was really just a few more bites than the two I intended. Then I decided I would eat from that carton until the computer finally opened a program I was waiting to use. 
     But the computer was so slow. Another bite. Then another. I was eating as slow as the computer was working. So, you can see, it wasn't really my fault I ate it all, because it was the darn computer. The longer I waited for the computer to open the program, the more frustrated I became. The more frustrated I became, the more I justified the food in my hand. 
     It wasn't my fault, after all. It was the stupid computer. 
     Then I went to hide the ice cream container in the trash, which was overflowing. So I stuffed it in the bag, put something bigger over it and took the trash out to the garage. 
     I dusted off my hands — mission covert food addiction accomplished — and hopped in the shower. 
     There's NO DOUBT my complexion is related to the sugar or the dairy,  both of which I can hardly tolerate in large amounts. My reflection tells me a truth I don't want to acknowledge, and it doesn't lie. 
     But here's another truth. I'm normally so much better with food choices. I had been freed from the pain and suffering caused by years of abusive eating more than a year ago thanks to my full-body cellular cleansing and fat-burning replenishment system via Isagenix. 
      Well, I thought I was. 
     I used my pregnancy — not as an excuse, because excuses are excusable. Rather I used my pregnancy to justify something I should not be doing. That carried over in breastfeeding. Don't ask how, but in my mind, it all made sense. Extra calories. Pampering my body, which was suffering the ups and downs — mostly downs — of pregnancy and then caring for a newborn. And the struggles of early breastfeeding. 
     You may be wondering why this is any big deal at all. I mean, is ice cream bad? Most people don't think so in the slightest. 
      The truth is, yes and no. This product is made of ingredients that make me sick. They make everyone sick, if we're honest, but they make me sicker than most people. And I KNOW in my heart that I can satisfy that craving with something healthy. I also KNOW I could have stopped at two bites. I also KNOW I could have recognized the signs a few more bites in that I was emotionally eating. I also KNOW that I was playing games to justified my bad choice. 
     I guess I'm making progress, because I'm seeing it more clearly now, even if in retrospective. I understand what I'm doing. I know it's wrong, and I want to make right choices. I want to make right choices because I've cleansed my body, which helped me in all ways with cravings. I know that a clean body wants what it needs, not what's sitting in the freezer. And I know when my body is alkaline and clean, it functions so much better. Gone is the restlessness, the mental fog and the lack of energy throughout the day. My pain was resolved once I made better choices in my diet. My eating habits made my body function better, and I was much happier. That's right, eating good food (which doesn't include Prairie Farms ice cream, believe it or not!) made me happier. Feed the body, fuel the mind!
     Yet here I was stumbling. I had just told my husband two days earlier I had a food addiction. I admitted that I had bought a Reese's PB cup in the store checkout that day. 
     So what, he said. That doesn't mean you're addicted to food.  
     Bless him. He's so nice. He loves me, and he doesn't want me to feel bad about myself. He never has. So in a way, he helps me justify. I don't want him to help me justify. I want to be free again. 
     I hid the wrapper in a zipper pocket of my purse, I said. 

Evidence of my food addiction can be found tucked away in undisclosed locations. 

     It's not like it was the first time, I said, but just in my head this time. 
     I realized that it's a thing I do. It's a thing I've always done. 
     Sure, there are some people who eat giant stacks of Oreos and 65-ounce sodas out in the open. They may know it's bad or that it's unhealthy. Heck, they may even realize they have a food addiction. They may be struggling. I don't know, because they aren't me. I just know my food addiction is a covert one. It's hard for me to admit. I think the ones who do it openly might have more integrity than me. But let's be honest, a food addiction is dangerous and the struggle is real no matter where the battleground is. 
     Even harder than food addiction, at least for me, is admitting that the food controls me. I allow the food to control me. I'm out of control. 
     I said this to my husband, tears streaming down my face. He made some joke about how he was on his second lunch. He was. But both were relatively healthy. I don't see him binging on ice cream. Ever. 
     Besides, I said. I'm not here to condemn or point out anyone else's eating habits. I am here to say, I have a problem, and I need help. 
     The truth is Isagenix was a tool that helped me overcome the food addiction I wasn't even admitting I had a year ago. Now that I KNOW I have a problem, I'm using the fact that I can't cleanse as an excuse to further justify my bad behavior. 
     I still have some tools. The products I can eat have some qualities to assist me with the addiction, plus I can utilize Rod Hairston's wonderful new coaching program for a healthy mind and body. (I'm in heaven about this addition to a company that already stands for integrity and completeness in everything it does!) And I still and always have the power of prayer. Now, I can add to my tools that I have knowledge, which I've been told is power. (Ha! See how I did that there?)
     Much as I hated admitting I'm addicted to food, God — in his infinite wisdom — blessed me with a girl's writing yesterday to confirm that I am SUPPOSED to share this with you. Isabelle Loux has written about her struggles with anxiety and depression, writing I'm blessed that she's allowing to be published in Mighty Strong Girls. But the truth is, her perspective has blessed me as the writing of so many girls in this ministry has! 
     They constantly remind me that we don't get help in the dark. We MUST bring our struggles into the light. There, we find hope, mercy, Jesus, forgiveness and community. We discover we aren't alone, and mostly importantly, we help one another. 
     If this resonates with you, then join me, please. Help me be accountable, and I'll help you. Let's live this struggle out — in the light. Let this post be the start of a conversation, and let's get really real with one another!

Disobedience: My hidden sin

     Do you ever feel like God is nudging you to do something, yet you are holding back? 
     There are some things in life I'm certain of, and one of those is that all God wants from me is obedience. My obedience, which looks far different than the obedience of His other children, is always a battle. I'm a stubborn control-freak of a child. True story.
     It's also a fact that being obedient to God helps me with so much more than my faith. It keeps my eyes on Him so as to not be bound by jealousy or bitterness. It keeps me squarely in His purpose for me alone. It helps me to see through His eyes, so I'm more apt to love and pray for other people and use my gifts for His glory. 
     Typically, being obedient to Him means I have little time to worry about the sins of others, criticize, judge or condemn. If I'm honest, doing what He tells me usually involves me working on my sins and purpose, so He can give me freedom to soar in my identity in Christ. 
     But there was this one thing He asked me to do four years ago that I stubbornly dig my heels in about every chance I get. 
     God made it clear to me that I am to share stories of myself and to do so authentically, using my voice through writing on this blog and other publications. Part of me loved this calling, because I have always had a deep passion for writing. But there was part of me holding back from the very beginning. 
    The authentically part. Because being authentic means being honest with yourself and exploring areas of the depth of your soul you may not really want to. Subjects that are dark and difficult. Parts of me I'd rather hide.
    I did not want to bring these into the light. So like most defiant children, I didn't. I wrote about what I wanted to write about and ignored the truths He laid out in front of me. 
     I cannot tell you how detrimental this was to my health and particularly how it affected not just my spiritual being but my physical and emotional selves, too. (See above. The parts about jealous, bitterness, love and gifts. Yep, I was regularly a hot mess of ugliness!)
     Not long ago I read an article about the hidden sins of Christians. Two of them stood out at me as if God Himself had gotten out His bright pink highlighter for my sake: hypocrisy and caring more about what other people think than what God thinks. 
     I have a real problem with hypocrisy, as you can tell. 
     You see, I was holding back complete obedience to God in my writing and blogging because I thought to do so would make me seem arrogant. I like to think of one of my spiritual strengths as humility. I like to serve, and I highly value those amazing servants who do so without much fanfare or praise, whose work is so far behind the scenes that maybe, just maybe, God is the only witness. I don't like being in the limelight; I never have. So to say that writing about my struggles — some that I've overcome and some that are sins I still wrestle with — would be outside my comfort zone is the understatement of the decade. My history in writing is to interview other people and write their stories, not to write my own. 
     There were other factors at play, too. 
     Fear of criticism and judgement, fear that others would view me as prideful, an unlikely expert for writing about the topics I'm called to write about. Not surprisingly, fear is the subject of an upcoming Mighty Strong Girls publication, and God was revealing to me through others' writing submissions how I was letting my fear rule me and keep me from obedience. 
     So I balked. Over and over, I let me fear trump my calling. 
     A few weeks ago, my pastor preached about Nehemiah and how God used Him to rebuild the temple as God wants to use us to rebuild our lives, His church and His kingdom. 
     It resonated with me, as God has recently been rebuilding my life, and I realized I was not walking in full with His beautiful purpose for me because of my disobedience. 
     I know my calling. That much is clear. But I'm distracted by other things that seem tempting. I'm distracted by fear and criticisms. 
     That sermon opened my eyes to the fact that I'm getting in my own way with my disobedience. I am blocking God from using me for the very purposes He designed me for!
     God never promised I wouldn't face criticism, so in a way, my fears are founded on fact. 
     But why do we think for one moment that to walk in His will as we walk toward our purpose that He will reward us by lavishing us with constant blessings. Jesus' disciples made sacrifices. They were mocked. They, too, had fears and doubts. 
     Fears have never been powerful enough to stop destiny! Take my fear of childbirth, for instance. I did it — three times, mind you — and lived to tell the tale. It's walking through and facing those fears that builds our faith and our testimony. 
     To bring our stories into the light...it's not about us anyway, especially when He calls us to do it. Even when we don't like the way He wants us to do it. Who am I to think I know better than Him the way in which I'm to do His work. 
     It is encouraging for me to remember that Nehemiah and Daniel and Jesus' disciples and David and even Jesus Himself were not immune to fears, temptations and doubts. However, they did not change the fact that these men had great work at hand for their lives, God's church and His kingdom. 
     So do I. 
     And so do you. 

Persistence

     Romans 12:12 

Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.

     When I launched Mighty Strong Girls four years ago, I wrongly assumed that because I was acting on the will of God that life would suddenly get better and easier. 

     Some things did. Partners quickly emerged. Prayers were answered. 

     But not everything was easy. Most of all, my personal growth and development. I had a long way to go to really prepare my heart and mind for this ministry work. 

     Why I didn't think I needed to transform just shows my spiritual immaturity. 

     I mean, think about it. Most all of those great men and women of the Bible who worked in the will of God had a period of preparation and trials that tested their perseverance. Moses tried to argue with God that he wasn't qualified. Nobody thought David would be God's chosen king for a nation. God called him at a young age, but he wouldn't become king for many, many years. During his journey of preparation, David's brothers mocked him for thinking he could go up against Goliath; Saul doubted him. 

     Sadly, attacks on ministry don't just come from the world. God's own people were some of the worst critics of those who were doing His work. Not even Jesus escaped criticism — some from his own earthly family. Judas betrayed Him; Peter denied Him.

     If Jesus had to overcome temptation and trials to complete His ministry, why do we think it will be any easier for us?  

     Discouragement is everywhere. And when it comes, it rains down on our desire to persevere.  How many of us want to quit (jobs, sports, diets, church, etc.) when things get hard? How often do we want to walk away when things seem too overwhelming? How many times do we want to let someone else carry the load when it seems to unbearable? 

     I'm reminded that to persevere in ministry, as in life, I must be persistent. How can I be persistent? As the scripture above states, I must not only never give up, but I must also be patient and in a constant state of prayer. 

     Often when I'm facing a major shaking in my life, as I am now, I sense from God that it's time to turn to Him in prayer. That perhaps I've turned away from Him or let my prayer life fade or that it's time to take my prayer to a new level. 

     It's time for me to get away so I can wait. To run off with my Bible and prayer journal, to spend time with my Beloved, who calls on me. It's time to be persistent — not just in doing His work. Sometimes we wrongly put the emphasis on what we can do: the busy work of crossing things off a list. But what He wants isn't our work, it's our relationship with Him. Persistence cannot be carried out without His guidance. I can't be guided without a relationship. I can't cross things off my list without Him. Sometimes, quite frankly, to persist we must simply stop. Stop doing so much. Stop relying on ourselves. Stop trying to control. 

     To wait on the Lord, as He says in His word, is to know Him. Persistently, I must wait patiently and in prayer.     

     Be honest. Doesn't that seem so much easier than trying to run and do and cross things off a list? Why do we think our Lord and Savior wants to create more work for us when all He really desires is that we wait and listen for Him? He is all we ever need.  

Overcoming my late-in-life pregnancy fears

     So, I'm probably about to have blog-rrhea. There was so much I wanted to write while pregnant, and the truth is...I was terrified to put my thoughts into writing during those months. 
     It was one of the most fearful seasons of my life.
     Fear...
     ...I would lose the baby. 
     ...something serious was wrong with the baby. 
     ...of our home sale falling apart. 
     ...that putting my kids back in public school was the wrong decision. 
     ...we wouldn't be able to afford another child. 
     ...of every single symptomatic issue I had in pregnancy. (Yes, I spent a lot of time on Google. Then I admitted I had a problem, promised to stay off the Internet and relapsed after about 24 hours. I realize I have issues!)
     ...that if I talked about any of this, something dreadful would happen. 
     ...I would gain too much weight, not be able to lose the weight after the pregnancy.
     ...I would succumb to food addictions.  
     ...of giving birth naturally, which I was trying to commit myself to doing but even my efforts left me doubting I could. 
     ...God would hate me or punish me for so many fears and doubts. 
      ...of my fears. (My anxiety disorder seemed so under control until this....all of this. It was overwhelming!)
     So I didn't write them. Or speak them. 
     But they haunted me. 
     ...at every doctor's appointment. 
     ...with every snide comment about my age in pregnancy. 
     ...in every headline about a stillbirth or studies about the dangers of pregnancy "late in life." 
     ...during the day and into the night. 
     ...as I listened to a horrendous podcast about depression in pregnancy (1 in 3 women suffer, almost always in silence) and wondered if it was me the author was describing. 
     ...with all the insomnia bouts that returned with a vengeance in my third trimester. 
     I was so glad God was speaking to me during this time and reassuring me. But me, in Amy-the-persistent-worrier fashion, continued to doubt and question. For every worry or fear, I grasped onto the one person who could bring me peace and reassurance. I had to keep going back to Him time and time again because I had such a restless spirit. I think He probably had me right where He wanted me. But I couldn't help shake my feelings of inadequate faith. It was touch and go. 
     I wish I could say that I had a great support network. I definitely had friends who were checking in on me and a husband who was there to listen to all my insecurities. 
     But for every friend who was supportive, there were three people who were negative. Some were silently protesting. Others whispered behind my back. I felt every sting. We received comments like, "How could you be so stupid (to get pregnant at your age)?" "Do you know how this happens?" and my all-time favorite said right to my face, "You're f----ed." 
     Many of these comments came from so-called friends. 
     It was so hard to share our news, not knowing what the reaction would be from a world where the attitudes about a fetus fall more along the lines of a "clump of cells," rather than my precious daughter, a life, a creation of God's. 
     An older woman having a baby seemed foolish. Heck, even I was skeptical in the beginning. It certainly wasn't our plan. 
     But it was our prayer. It was just a prayer from seven years prior...long forgotten. 
     At least we'd forgotten. 
     But someone hadn't. That one person — all holy and almighty — didn't forget the cries of my heart. And deep down, I trusted His timing. He said no to my prayer then. But He said yes to my prayer in this chapter. 
     So I trusted in Him, while so many others disappointed. 
     Faith. But a shaky, insecure, immature faith, to be sure. 
     Still, a glorious story unfolded in spite of my fears when my beautiful baby entered the world. 

Our sweet daughter, born in God's timing as His plan unfolds for our lives.

     She came naturally. But not without trouble. Her positioning was wrong. Labor, which I thought would be fast and not nearly as painful for all my preparation, didn't deliver on those promises. 
     But I was reminded that God doesn't promise life will be easy. He simply promises He will walk through it with us. 
     The birthing plan I had, the techniques I had practiced and prayed upon did not work out like I had hoped. But the scriptures I had written out on notecards gave me the hope and reassurance I need. Just as His word and my relationship with Him carried me through each day of the pregnancy. 
     Indeed, I was never alone. And I knew, no matter what happened to me or the baby, He would help me through it. After all, this was His plan, unfolding in His timing in answer to a deep prayer of my heart. 

The long awaited sonogram didn't provide the answers we were hoping for!

      I wasn't prepared for this. 
     Well, maybe a little. 
     A week before I stood staring with my jaw drooping to the floor, positive pregnancy test in hand, we finally made a decision to move forward with adoption. In an all-new way. All four of us decided we were equipped to handle a baby. We could logistically do it. We were mentally and emotionally prepared. We would go through classes and become a foster family to a newborn. It was settled. 
     And then the unthinkable happened. Six weeks shy of my 41st birthday I discovered that the two missed periods weren't symptomatic of pre-menapause. Or some fluke.
     Immediately, my doctor sprung into action. Blood test in the next three hours. Immediate appointment. She even came in at 8 a.m. on the first morning of her week off to see me. 
     Because. Because of my age, I am HIGH RISK. 
     Frankly, it seemed like more hype than necessary. I just ran a 10-mile race — seven more miles than I'd ever ran consecutively before 2014. I was down 22 pounds and feeling better than I did when I was in my 20s! I felt WAY more healthy than I did in my early pregnancies with the other two. 
     Didn't matter. Statistically speaking, I have a higher rate of complications. So does the baby. 
     Speaking of the baby's risks, I had taken prednisone in early December for a freaky outbreak of poison oak or ivy that was all over my arm and face. It was not a super high dose, but it wasn't a low dose either. 
     My doctor looked at the dates and decided rather than send me to a neonatal specialist, she would check closely for birth defects at our sonogram at 20 weeks. Specifically she mentioned mid-line birth defects of the heart, spine and possible cleft lip/palate. 
     That day came on Monday, and I was certain beyond a shadow of a doubt that God was going to show up and the results would indicate what a perfect baby I was carrying. That He would give me peace and comfort that the medicine hadn't done damage. 
     I should have known better. 
     She was wiggly and uncooperative. She spun to put her back to the "camera" and there were no good images to be had of her heart, lower spine or face. Everything else they could see just fine, especially the fact that she is a SHE. Except the places where we wanted reassurance. 
     I was angry. Because a few weeks earlier I had read a study that sonogram technology has been linked to autism/ADHD/neurological issues. I decided on the spot that we wouldn't do another one. So God HAD to show up. Right? Ugh! So why had he abandoned me?
     We had a wonderful chat with our doctor, who was honest and admitted there are risks doing another sonogram. She didn't do all the recommended sonograms on her own pregnancy. She supported our decision after she had already told us that everything they could see on the images suggested that this baby is very, very healthy. So am I and so is the pregnancy. 
     Dan and I have peace in that if there is a defect, we live in a community with the very best doctors and medical resources. Our girl will be fine. We will be fine. Even if everything isn't perfect. 
     Life is really never perfect anyhow. It's a little broken. And a little messy. And a little unpredictable. And a lot challenging. 
     Which is why we (especially me!) NEED God. That's where I should have known better. Each time I make a step of faith, I find myself in an imperfect spot. In other words, just because I trusted God and He helped me through a situation doesn't mean He's done with me. 
     Instead, there's another step I must take. Sometimes a bigger one or a harder one than the last. It's simple really. If I didn't need Him, I might let go. But He isn't letting me. This sonogram result is really a gift, reminding me that no matter how smart technology is and no matter how much I think I can handle something on my own, I'm really hopeless and helpless without Him by my side. 
     As I worked through my anger with Him for not providing this reassurance, this answer to prayer, I realized sometimes He's answering even bigger prayers of ours. I would never want to be estranged from Him, especially in my hardest hours. Especially as I continue to be bombarded with information — like statistics about stillborn babies born to older moms — and people's insane opinions that we're too old (and consequently stupid) to "let" this happen. (For the record, we had two types of infertility but just went on a super foods diet and cleanse with an amazing company!) 
     I have a confession to make, and it's hard for me to make it. Because it shows how vulnerable and untrusting and hard-hearted I am. These comments and stories and statistics have made me detached. Fear of losing the baby has made me less engaged in this pregnancy. Less excited. Less hopeful. Sadly, I realized today that a detached mom is never a good mom. 
     A baby is ALWAYS a blessing. I realized if the baby doesn't live a day outside the womb, it's still my job (and my greatest privilege) to be the best mom I can be until the point that I'm no longer a mom to this girl or my other children. 
     So I made a decision that I will begin bonding with this sweet, active girl right now. Just like my amazing son, who has been reading stories and books to the baby since before she could read. Yes, I think I will have faith like his. Faith like a child. 

Three ways to lessen fear

     You know what's really beautiful about fear? Perfect love casts it out. 
     The theme of my blog post this week is about fear. Some days I have none, and other days, I seem so consumed with it that it paralyzes my everyday tasks. 
     If you have fears a lot, or even occasionally, you are in good company. Even some of the most courageous heroes of the Bible had moments of hesitation and chances to overcome great fears, which always strengthened their faith. Fear is really an opportunity to grow closer to God.
     When I struggle with the choking squeeze of something threatening, I look to their stories to be reminded of how I can overcome. 
     Here are three ways to face fear: 
     1. Timing is everything. I love the story of Esther. I especially love how perfectly every detail is spun in time. The fact that she was fasting (and likely praying) before she made her move. Patience is often key when it comes to acting on things. Fear promulgates an irrational sort of impulsiveness. But being impetuous can cause anger, missteps and regrets. Love, on the other hand, is patient. 
     Esther had the courage to petition the king by way of a banquet for him and Haman. The king tells her that he will give her virtually anything she asks for. Yet she simply asks the king and Haman to come to another banquet the following night and then she will ask her question of the king. 
     Why didn't she just ask then? The story doesn't tell us. What a strange thing to do! Did she lose her courage? Or was she simply waiting on God's perfect timing?
     Later that night, when the king is wrestling with sleeplessness, he asks to look at the book of chronicles, a record of his reign. That is when he is reminded of the man, Mordecai, who saved King Xerxes life when he reported overhearing two guards talking about assassinating him. It was then King Xerxes realizes that nothing was done to thank or reward Mordecai. He falls asleep with a deep appreciation of the man he had forgotten to remember and a plan to right that wrong!  
     The next night, Esther reveals Haman's evil plan to destroy all Jews because of his hatred for Mordecai. 
     Can you imagine how this story would have turned out if the king didn't recall who Mordecai was? 
     God is in every detail. He is in the timing, His perfect timing. He is patient and just. 
     We can face our fears by being patient and trusting in God's timing. 
     2. Let your freak flag wave. One of my favorite lines from Shrek the Musical, letting your freak flag wave is another way of saying don't be afraid to be bold and true to yourself. 
     I wonder if Noah had any fears as he was building the ark. Will this thing float? How will the animals get on board? How will they get along? How will my family get along? Will it be done in time? Not to mention the fear of what everyone was thinking and saying about him as he built the ark. 
     The Bible is often vacant of the emotion, leaving the reader to imagine what was going through the minds of God's people. Genesis only tells us what Noah did; it doesn't reveal to us how he felt. But it doesn't take a rocket scientist to imagine that Noah was one freak-flag-waving dude. He was obedient. He trusted God, despite how strange he must have seemed to those around him. 
     One of my favorite verses in the Bible is Genesis 8:11, which inspired a beautiful mosaic that my daughter made last year of the dove carrying an olive branch in its beak. The verse simple says, "When the dove returned to him in the evening, there in its beak was a freshly plucked olive leaf! Then Noah knew that the water had receded from the earth." 
     First off, that exclamation point is a big clue. The authors in the Bible don't tend to overuse them like the author of this blog does! It was a big, hairy deal that after 40 days of non-stop raining and another 150+ days of flooding and then receding of another 40+ days there was a leaf. 
     Genesis 8:11 doesn't include the word HOPE, but in my mind, it's the theme of this verse. It's the reward for waving the freak flag. God always comes through when we are obedient to Him. The master of the universe knows what He's doing. Trusting Him = overcoming fears. 
     3. Put fear in perspective. The fears we face often seem way bigger from our limited vantage point. 
     Just think of puny David slaying Goliath. Nobody thought it could be done. The Isrealites plotted and they planned, but in the end, they chickened out. And here comes this unlikely hero, saying he will face the giant that had an army cowering like a toddler trembling under the sheets afraid of a monster under the bed.
     Then David rejects the armor and helmet and takes five smooth stones and his slingshot instead. Can you imagine? He, too, was waving a freak flag, folks! Even Goliath mocks David. But in typical limited human mind fashion, David was over prepared for the job. He only needed the one stone, which sank into Goliath's forehead and knocked him to the ground, striking him dead. 
     When I think of those things that cause me to tremble, I have to remember to trust God. He has the timing figured out. He has prepared me uniquely for the job, freaky though I might feel at times, and He has more than equipped me for the task. I'm praying next time I begin to fear, I will trust more and leave the extra four stones behind.  

Three ways to live a life of content

     Maybe it's the fact that my house is on the market and I'm at my wit's end financially and with home school. Or perhaps its that I'm constantly filled with ideas and a propensity to act boldly on them without first prayerfully considering each and every idea. Or that sometimes I pray an issue to death when I should have simply acted on, and I have an uncanny ability in 80 percent of situations to over OR under pray. Regardless of the reason or circumstances, I've been feeling like I've been living in a state of discontent. 
     The waiting room. 
     I've called it this before. It's where I sit and (God help me) pray and listen patiently (as if!) for God to answer. I'm laying it before Him and wondering if He will make the path clear. Or how long I should wait exactly before I must do something. Is it logic that's driving me or faith? I've relied of faith for so long that I'm beginning to wonder if I shouldn't just do something. I don't really want to take control away from God, but I also know God gave me a brain and skills. Logic dictates that if I'm having a struggle, I should work through it with the brains and resources He gave me. That's faith, too, right?
     It can sometimes be confusing to know just what to do, but one thing is certain. God is not a God of chaos. He beckons us into His peaceful presence, of only we will reach out and take His hand. 
     Today's blog is about three ways I can be content. 
     Content, according to the dictionary, means "in a state of peaceful happiness." Two things immediately occur to me: happiness is temporary, and to be in a state is also temporary. The dictionary defines state as "the particular condition that someone or something is in at a specific time."
     I can't say for sure, but I don't think God wants us to be content only sometimes. I think He desires for us heaping portions of contentment, because it means that even when things aren't "settled" in life, we can rely on Him to bring us peace. He also understands that we are human, and sometimes we will screw this up no matter how hard we try. 
     Here are three things that have helped me: 
     1. Count your blessings — Literally begin to write down all the things you are grateful for. My friend Jan gave me a pocket-size book that I keep in my purse. It's a place I can be intentional about the blessings that are adding up in my life. You don't need a special book, though. Keep a journal or hang up a piece of lined paper in your kitchen. Dedicate a portion of your wall and call it the "Gratitude Wall." Or, put plain paper in frames and use Dry Erase markers to write out your messages of thanksgiving every day. 
    2. Pray — Nothing makes my heart more soft than to take it to the Lord. If I'm feeling particularly unsettled or stressed out, I sit down to pray with a promise that I won't get up until my jaw isn't clenched or my shoulders are no longer tense. Whatever spot you physically experience discontentment, don't stop praying until it's no longer affected. Take deep breaths. Concentrate on the rhythm of your breathing or your heart beat while you meditate on scripture. 
     Pray whatever the Lord brings to mind. Journal your prayer. Look up scriptures that He brings to mind. Try not to be resentful of your time in prayer, because He will assuredly help you complete whatever tasks you set aside to seek Him. Trust Him. You will do more with Him than you could ever accomplish on your own in that discontented space. I speak this wisdom from experience! 
     3. Choose peace over strife — Peace really has nothing to do with how much stuff I have, whether I've paid the bills or am living debt-free. It is not related to how my kids behave or whether I've accomplished anything on my task list. Peace isn't a result of a clean house or a loving husband or what's going on around me.  
     Peace is a fruit of the spirit. So if I'm living a life filled with the love of Christ Jesus, I will find contentment. The closer I am to Him, the more I am bathing in peace. When I sometimes stray, I begin to get an uneasy spirit.
      Remember that dictionary definition of content. I think it sounds nice, but I like what Paul says about contentment in God's word. Philippians 4:11-14 is one of my favorites: 
I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.  I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength. 
      We all go through periods when things aren't working out in a way we want them to. Whether it's my house selling, homeschooling, ministry work, my lack of -- and need for -- a paying job. All I really need is Him who gives me strength. 
     One of my favorite worships songs lately is Cornerstone by Hillsong United. Let these words sink into your soul:


My hope is built on nothing less
Than Jesus blood and righteousness
I dare not trust the sweetest frame
But wholly trust in Jesus name

Christ alone; cornerstone
Weak made strong; in the Saviour's love
Through the storm, He is Lord
Lord of all

When Darkness seems to hide His face
I rest on His unchanging grace
In every high and stormy gale
My anchor holds within the veil 

Three simple steps to be the smartest girl in the room

     OK, that title is a little misleading. This is actually a blog about three ways to get wisdom. Being smart and being wise are two different traits entirely. I know a lot of really smart, academic, intellectual, conversationally stimulating people. But most of them are unwise. 
     How could that be, you might ask. 
     Because God says so is the simple answer. 
     1 Corinthians 3:18-19a says, "Do not deceive yourselves. If any of you think you are wise by the standards of this age, you should become 'fools' so that you may become wise. For the wisdom of this world is foolishness in God's sight." 
     So the wise are dummies, and God wants us to be fools. I have to admit... I'm still struggling with a complete understanding of this concept.
     But the older I become, the more this comes into focus. 
     I once thought: 
     I NEED A DEGREE
     I NEED A CAREER
     I NEED A SALARY
     I NEED A BIG HOUSE
     I NEED TO LOOK LIKE "HER"
     I NEED TO MAKE MORE MONEY
     and the even more embarassing ones where I subjected friends to what I thought they needed to do. Don't get me started on all the poor, unwise counsel I've doled out over the years. 
     Today, I have two degrees, no career, no salary, a big house (OK, we do live in America, but our family is in the process of downsizing so cut me a little slack!), am content to look just the way I do and well, I still want to make more money. (Just being honest!) 
     What does God's kind of wisdom look like? Here are three ways you can be a so-called fool by today's standards: 
     1. Pray. Seek a relationship with the Lord. If you haven't yet, dive into the Bible every day. Even if you don't believe it or don't like it. The truth is if you want to oppose Christians, you probably ought to know what they believe. Go right to the source. If you are saved, go deeper in your relationship. Read your Bible more. Pray more. 
     2. Find a mentor. Actually a lot of today's standards are beginning to preach this, often based on John Maxwell's books. He's also a Christian. My faith has grown tremendously because of my mentors. Just one word of warning, there can be some Christians who are not exactly looking out for your best interests. (And remember all the horrible advice I've churned out?) Be sure to line up their thoughts with the Bible, and pray to be certain. I've had even well-meaning friends give me some awful advice. Most of what I've learned from mentors wasn't so much from their advice as it was from their example and their encouragement. If you are uncertain of the kind of person your mentor is or they seem to be overly critical, you might want to pray about whether that's a healthy relationship. 
     3.  Get involved in Mighty Strong Girls. Oh my! Who saw that coming... what an awful sales pitch! Actually, the magazine that will be revealed on Sunday is all about WISDOM. We are beginning to theme our publications on the new names the girls get in the God Spa. So we will study for 10-13 weeks about what it means to be wise. If any of my female readers out there think they would like to lead a small group, we are looking to plant more Mighty Strong Connections groups in central Illinois. Women who want to come alongside girls to be available as mentors, to love on them, to help guide them to be who they were created to be in Christ Jesus. As a mom, I'm so thankful that my daughter is in one of these groups where she can explore her own identity when it comes to Biblical wisdom of body, soul and spirit. How we treat our minds, deal with our emotions, handle our physical beings and grow spiritually matters very much to God. 
     In fact, He's begging us to come to Him. James 1:5 says, "If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you." 
    Whoa! That's huge! He has a gift he wants to give to us in heaping portions, and He isn't waiting there with a laundry list of our shortcomings to hold over our heads. Nope, He just wants us to ask. Come and get it. 
     So that's the offer I extend to you. Come and get it. Find out more about Mighty Strong Girls and how you can be a part of or help start a new small group in your home or church. We will be celebrating and selling the new issue of the magazine on WISDOM at 3 p.m. Sunday at Calvary Christian Temple in the Oasis room. Hope to see you there! 

Three ways to show LOVE

Ephesians 4:32 - Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.

If God is LOVE, I learn from Him how to display love. If I meditate on how He first loved me, I realize so much more about love. 

I mean, really think about it. If you know even a glimmer of the LOVE of God, compare that to wordly love. Love that we see in the movies, read about in books or witness between people in our lives. The love I see around me is often fake, based on material things and impatient. Fictional love in movies and books is uncomplicated, contrived, forceful.

God's LOVE looks so different than that. I realize that even when I was a hot mess, LOVE was patient, kind and gentle. God wasn't demanding or in my face. He also never left me, even when I left Him. He didn't dwell on my past mistakes. He forgave and forgot. He went out of His way to be kind to me, allowing me to understand my identity and be the person He created and even to serve Him in ways that bring joy to me. He even sent His son to die for me. That's sacrificial and complete and mysterious and amazing!

So, if we strive to show LOVE to others, we share with them the LOVE that God gave us personally. Here are three ways based on my personal knowledge of God to shower LOVE on each other: 

1. Be patient. That means we can't expect immediate results from our love of others. We can't throw a fit when we don't get our way in love. Are we even supposed to "get our way" when it comes to love? We need to set down our expectations. We need to put others above ourselves, even when they don't deserve it. Remember, God didn't rush you into a decision to follow Him, and we would be wise not to rush others into .... well, anything at all. Trust God when your intentions seem to be falling flat. 

 2. Be kind. Often when we are called to LOVE someone in Christian ways, it's someone who is hard to love. LOVE them anyway. Go out of your way to show kindness. Find out their love language (there are five: acts of service, words of affirmation, receiving gifts, quality time and physical touch) and use them to remind them that they are worthy of LOVE. Do this even when they don't deserve it. Do this especially when they are hard to love. That's the LOVE of our Father, who loves us even in our sin, even when we don't deserve His kindness. 

3. Be gentle. Don't remind others constantly of the reasons they are a hot mess. Don't point out their sins, their stumblings, their mistakes especially when they never asked you to play this role in their lives. Simply point them to Jesus, and let Him do the judging. Think about it: Did God reveal your sins to you BEFORE you were in a relationship with Him? Of course He didn't. Don't be the judge and jury for anyone, unless of course they have asked you to help them with their sins. A gentle love encourages and lifts up. It doesn't tear down and hate.

All of these have one thing in common: God. Submit to Him. Submission is not the negative, miserable, forceful thing our world tries to teach us it is. Submitting requires wisdom and grace. It's hard, but it's so worth it. Submission to God puts Him in control. When we trust Him, we are empowered to be the expression of LOVE He wants to reflect of Himself in our world. It's a beautiful thing. 

Finally, read 1 Corinthians 13. But each time you see the word "love," substitute God in its place. This is a little exercise my friend Jan Koch does with the Mighty Strong Girls spa. It's pretty powerful. Get your Bible, and read it aloud. It will remind you of how wonderful, beautiful and amazing the LOVE of God is, and who doesn't need that reminder?

Equipping the called

     We posted a few photos from one of our Mighty Strong Girls board events on Facebook, and immediately we had requests from women who wanted to be part of it. 
     Because it looked fun? 
     Because we were enjoying each other's company? 
     I'm not sure. I hope they could see that Christ was at the center. 
     When we meet, often we pray, worship and praise the Lord together. But we also have fun and truly deeply love one another. 

     It kind of reminds me of a sorority, except that I know virtually nothing about sororities. It's just that from the outside, it looks like a blast. We all have a sense of belonging, and a common identity. 

     It's funny, I always criticized my college boyfriend for joining a fraternity, saying he was essentially buying his friends. 

    Perhaps I was jealous. I've never felt like I make friends easily. Does anyone? I feel like I've been betrayed more times than not and made friends with someone just in time for us to be separated geographically. 

     I didn't feel like I fit in during my high school years. Most of my friends partied and slept around, even cheating on their boyfriends. I felt lonely and isolated. 

     I met my best friends in college, but I made so many bad choices then that I'm not sure many would recognize me now. I was the wild party girl. OK, I wasn't that wild, but I did lots of drinking and made many mistakes. Friendships there come naturally, especially over shared sin. 
    What I've struggled the most with is adult friendships, which have always seemed so forced and fake. 

     Until now. Until Mighty Strong Girls. 

     In a way, the friendships in Mighty Strong Girls are random, much like the members in a sorority. In a way, they aren't random at all. 

     I didn't choose these women. Not a single one of them. And truth be told, if I were picking women for the board of Mighty Strong Girls, I am not entirely sure they would make my lineup. I hope that doesn't offend them, because I'm almost certain none of them expected God's vision for this ministry to come through me. Yet each of us was called to be a part of Mighty Strong Girls in a strong way by the Lord. We are an unlikely, unsuspecting group of mismatched misfits. 

     That's why we are all so perfect together. Maybe you've heard the saying that God doesn't call the equipped, He equips the called. That's the process we are in right now.

     And that's the mystery and glory of God's great plan. He created each one of us unique, and He made us each with a purpose. A purpose that was predetermined. He knows. That's why this very random group came together. He had already called each of us to do a specific thing. As His vision became clear, and each of these women learned about or met me, God showed us His plans. He united us. He picked us. 

     Leaning on Him and stretching our faith isn't always easy. It isn't always fun. Every now and then a new mom or girl tries to be part of it and doesn't stay long, because it takes discipline, humility and authenticity. All of those are difficult, and the truth is, it took me most of my life to begin to understand and practice these three things. I'm still struggling with them! But with God's help, it's been so rewarding. 

     I believe another part of His great plan is to show us how to handle all the complications of female friendship so that we can more effectively inspire and educate our target audience we serve: girls 12-20. 

     He is equipping the called. Sometimes it feels like He's doing it with fire or pressure, but other times, it's freeing to know we can grow in trust and faith with Christ at the center. We know we'll never be perfect, but we are inspired to keep trying. We know He's transforming us into gold and diamonds -- just like He wants to do for all of His chosen princesses. 
     If you are interested in starting a Mighty Strong Connections group or hosting one, let us know. We'd be glad to help, and our curriculum is FREE on our website at www.mightystronggirls.com. 

Answering the call to pray

     God has really been speaking to me lately about prayer. 
    If you are skeptical that God actually speaks to people, be reassured that when we take the time to draw close to Him, He absolutely does! But it requires a committed relationship, and as you grow closer, His faithfulness is absolutely breathtaking. Not long ago, I believed that ordinary people did not hear from God, but prayer was the breakthrough that increased my faith. 
     I have always cherished prayer. It's not just a "thing" I do now and then but an open pattern of communication between me and the Lord. Lately, He's been bringing a new message about prayer to me. 
     Get on your knees. 
     Stay in prayer until you have peace. 
     Rest in me. 
     The sermons at church, my daily Bible reading and just about everything I come across is used by God to deliver the message to me that He wants me to REST in the power of prayer. 
     As if that wasn't enough, one my prayer partners/intercessors sends these quotes to me with no knowledge of the things God is speaking to me: 
     "I have so much to do that I spend several hours in prayer before I am able to do it." ~ John Wesley

     "Prayer is the greatest power that God has put into the hands for service -- at least I find it so. But, the dynamic lies that way to advance the kingdom." ~ Mary Slessor

     So I decide that in addition to my daily Bible and devotion readings in the morning, I need to increase my prayer. My goal is 30 minutes every morning, and I don't exactly set a watch. I simply pray over every person who is on my heart and mind. And to make sure I'm not overlooking anything, I began writing down the people/issues I am praying over and at least some of my prayer in a journal. 
     It may sound like a lot of work, but it's not! I've done this on and off before, but for the first time, I have a dedicated prayer journal. 
     And get this. I'm on day three, and He is answering prayers! It's absolutely amazing to see Him at work so mightily. 
     Here's one example: On day one, I prayed for someone to help me with Mighty Strong Girls work, specifically managing the blog, and on day two, a woman emailed me about this very subject! I asked her, and she (in prayer) accepted!
     I know not every prayer is going to be answered yes, and some are much more complicated than that. In fact, the prayers I have for Mighty Strong Girls aren't always yes/no prayers. Our whole board and a team of prayer warriors is praying daily for discernment, timing, favor, justice and wisdom over this ministry. Yes, we believe God answers our prayers. Of course the blog would keep on going without a manager, but God has a purpose and a plan that involves how He's called me and Sarah, and because we both sought Him, His purposes can be fulfilled and the blog will be that much better. Simply because we said yes to prayer. We'd love it if you would join the Mighty Strong Girls team in prayers...we covet prayer!
    I can also -- in just three days -- see signs of God's fingerprints in relationships, signs that He wants to heal not just physical ailments but also our brokenness. In fact, I'm praying specifically for my children to become more respectful. My daughter was put to the test yesterday, and more prayers were answered!
     If you enjoy prayer, I invite you to meet me here and pray with me on the blog. If you have a prayer request, leave it in the comments, and I'll add it to my list. A 30-minute investment in prayer can produce so much fruit in our lives! 
     Here is an excerpt from my written prayer this morning:
     Lord, your answer to prayer is fueling my faith and lighting it on fire! What a blessing...I praise you, the author and perfecter of life and love. Help strengthen me for your mission to bring depression and other tough issues to light -- boldly with truth and for the sake of the gospel. Give me a heart that meditates on gladness, goodness, and gratitude. Thank you for your faithfulness and all the good things you give us to meditate on for your glory! Keep my eyes ahead -- not to the left or right -- but firmly fixed on Jesus and what you're calling me to do. Amen. 

Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful. 
Colossians 4:2

Her healing was complete in Christ

     I have discovered over the years that while I sometimes feel like the queen of “TMI” (too much information), it is often my fear of talking about life in real ways that isolates me and keeps me from receiving all God wants for me.
      Not only that, but it separates me from others instead of uniting us. Because our stories are the explanations for why we stumble, the reasons we sometimes succeed, and why we may appear the way we do to others around us.
      Until we understand what motivates another human being, we cannot be united.
      It is time, if there ever was another, to be authentic, genuine and transparent. That is the heart of Mighty Strong Girls —to shed light on all things the enemy would have us keep hidden shamefully in the dark.
      So here’s a couple reveal-all truths about me: I have five plantar warts on my feet — two on one foot and three on another. Not that big of a deal, you may think. They have been there since my last pregnancy — 10 years ago! They have been frozen twice at my dermatologist‘s office, and I have tried every medical and alternative treatment at my disposal to no avail. In the meantime, both of my children have gotten the virus and developed warts that were easily treated and cured. I sooooo want a pedicure, but I’m plagued by embarrassment and shame.
      Here’s the second TMI: I struggle frequently with severe, sometimes debilitating pain caused by endometriosis, a disorder of migrating ovarian tissue that —in my case — has attached itself to my bowels and other organs. I find myself often clenching my teeth through the pain, fearful of lashing out at others around me as it takes every bit of emotional energy and mental strength — not to mention the grace of God and a plethora of prayers — to prevent the “outer me” from being a reflection of the turmoil and angst I feel on my inside.
      When there is something about your body that seems odd, pain-filled, unusual or untreatable, it begins to transform how you feel about yourself. A few warts can make a middle-aged mom quite self-conscious; the pain of my disorder can make me feel all-around ugly.
      It makes me identify just a little with the unnamed sick woman in the Bible. She had been bleeding for 12 years. She was suffering, and doctors could do nothing, as her condition grew worse instead of better.
      Do you know anyone who has been through such a trial? Have you? I cannot fathom her fear and pain, but in her faith, she sought out a different type of healing.
      I do not think it was a desperate manuveur, though I imagine her life was lived in a state of desperation. She had heard the stories of Jesus — this Son of God, Son of Man who performed miracles, who was healing the sick and lame, exorcising demons and walking on water.
      She must have known without a shadow of a doubt that He was capable of doing what no mere human could and stop the bleeding once and for all. It probably took an extraordinary effort in those days to get close the Him, as crowds of thousands followed Him everywhere He went.
      She did not have a friend in His ministry or influential contacts (I imagine she was lonely, as often those with long-term medical issues are rejected and discarded by society at large), so she would have to take her bleeding, aching body and make her way to Him. She was not planning a face-to-face meeting; she probably did not feel worthy of taking up any of Jesus’ precious time, as I imagine most everyone else didn‘t treat her as valuable so even in her faith, she likely doubted He would either!

      Still, she thought to herself that all she really needed was to touch the hem of his cloak. So she pressed in. She pressed in to the crowds and pressed in to get close enough, and she reached out.
      The bleeding stopped and instantly the sick woman was no longer defined by the malfunctioning body she lived inside. The chains were broken; she was free. It must have felt absolutely indescribably incredible. But this was not a feeling exclusive to her. Just as instantly as she touched the fabric on Jesus‘s cloak, He felt her healing, too.
      Can you imagine? Our healing is not something we alone feel. It is not an isolated celebration. Not only does the Lord know when we are healed, he feels and experiences it alongside us! Isn’t that exciting!
      Jesus knew His power had been utilized even in the midst of a sea of bodies bumping and knocking into Him like waves. Even the bewildered disciples asked Him how He could single out one person touching Him in the wild crowd. But Jesus wants to acknowledge her, not because He does not know. He simply is inviting her to share her testimony. So He waits.
      Finally the woman — now defined by her wholeness and not her unhealthiness — acknowledges, fearful of God, trembling at the feet of Jesus and confessing that it was her.   She is a woman who knew the fear of God. She is aware of his almighty power, that He is God of the universe who can do great and wonderful things.
      She had been shunned and dismissed — the kind of patient who keeps relentlessly pursuing medical care for the same symptoms. Doctors were probably patient initially,
determined to find a cure, to get to the bottom of her mysterious bleeding. But after 12 years, I wonder how many of those experts remained resolute in finding a cause for her
hurting. Who, I wonder, remained by her side at all for all those years as her health continued on a downward spiral?
      She schemed and succeeded. She seized the wonderful power of God through the vessel of Jesus and His healing touch. Now Jesus wanted her to share what she had done. In fact, Luke’s version of the story says she tells her story “in the presence of all the people.”
      Don’t you think that’s why He asked, so that she would share her testimony of her wholistic healing? It wasn’t just about the physical. I believe Jesus wanted her to understand the whole healing that had taken place just then — emotionally, she now knew true love; mentally, she was freed from the torment of physical pain and the sadness of social isolation; and spiritually, she had no doubt of her Savior, as she entered a personal, intimate relationship with the Son of God.
      Jesus wanted her to verbalize her story — not for His sake. For the crowd to hear, for her to know, for you to understand the mysterious, amazing power of God and what He desires to do in our lives because of His great love for us when we simply fear him and have faith.
      “Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace and be freed from your suffering,” Jesus says to the woman in Mark 5:34.
      His healing starts with trust and faith. To open myself up for physical healing through expert care, I must connect with the master Healer spiritually, to be available for the miraculous, to trust in a healing power not entirely available in my physician’s office.
      To fully heal means I must be willing to change, open to something radical, much like the woman who had seen all the doctors and done all the “normal” things. I must also be open to sharing, willing to tell others, available to testify to the power of Jesus.
      My Savior desires for me to be authentic, honest, real, transparent and available to share His truth. This is what heals, but it is also what unites. It is what bonds us and saves us.
      We invite you, dear readers and sisters in Christ, to open your mind and heart to the stories and ideas as you take a journey on with Mighty Strong Girls to transform.
      The first step to change begins on the inside; it is a LIFELONG ENDEAVOR with everlasting consequences.

     Mighty Strong Girls is evolving — now filled with more girls' stories, more advice from girls to girls, a FREE small group study guide, and growth opportunities and challenges in wholistic health. You can now buy a copy online at http://mightystronggirls.com/the-magazine.html